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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27911725">i’m sorry, i want to go home</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/spellingbees/pseuds/spellingbees'>spellingbees</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Minecraft (Video Game)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Arguments, Crying, Dream Smp, Dreams, Ghostbur, Hurt No Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Nightmares, kind of comfort but it’s not really enough, tommy just wants to go home</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 19:01:19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,061</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27911725</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/spellingbees/pseuds/spellingbees</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>"Tommy?" a voice called. It wasn't Ghostbur. It sounded like...</p>
<p>"Tubbo?" Tommy said, barely more that a whisper.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>or, after Tommy is exiled he has a dream turned nightmare, and wakes up basically alone.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Clay | Dream &amp; TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), No Romantic Relationship(s), Toby Smith | Tubbo &amp; TommyInnit, Wilbur Soot &amp; TommyInnit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>168</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>i’m sorry, i want to go home</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hi, so i’m a little nervous to post this because I haven’t written anything like this, so please be kind. Also I wrote it in like an hour or less so keep that in mind. I just had this idea and had to do something. Obviously, this is based on their SMP characters and not their real life personas. Anyway, I hope you all enjoy :D</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Tommy opened his eyes. He was in his tent, still in Logsted. He bit his lip, shivering slightly. He had been laying in his bed for awhile now, wallowing in his sorrow. Even Wilbur was fed up with his complaining. Or Ghostbur. Tommy sometimes forgot that the ghost was really more of a shadow of his late brother. Forgetting felt good sometimes, though. He wished he could forget Tubbo. </p>
<p>It was still hard to process the situation. Tommy was determined not to cry. He did not cry. It wasn't some sort of toxic masculinity thing, he just absolutely hated it and how exposed it made him feel. </p>
<p>"Tommy?" a voice called. It wasn't Ghostbur. It sounded like...</p>
<p>"Tubbo?" Tommy said, barely more that a whisper. It felt like the breath had been knocked out of him. It couldn't be Tubbo. Why would he be here?</p>
<p>"Tommy, I'm sorry. Please, I want to see you. I miss you," Tubbo's voice said. Tommy scrambled out of his tent, sprinting out into the open and looking around frantically. There, by the beach where he had arrived with Ghostbur and Dream, was Tubbo. </p>
<p>"Tubbo!" Tommy yelled. He started towards the boy, who had a relieved smile on his face. </p>
<p>"Wait, Tommy. Just... hear me out before you come any closer," Tubbo said, holding out a hand. "I'm so sorry, Tommy. I'm so, so sorry. I thought it would be best for you to be exiled. I thought it would be best for L'manburg. I didn't want to hurt you. If it were about me, I would never have sent you away. It hurts me too. But it's what I had to do for our nation. I had to give up what I cared about most. Just like you did."</p>
<p>"Tubbo..." Tommy said softly, at a loss for words. </p>
<p>"That's the problem though. You gave up what you cared about most. Your discs. You only care about your discs. You don't care about me, you didn't care about Wilbur, and you don't care about L'manburg. All that matters to you are those stupid discs." </p>
<p>"No, Tubbo, what? I do care. I care about you. I cared about Wilbur. And L'manburg. Why would I have given up my discs if I didn't care?" </p>
<p>"They're worthless, though, Tommy. They have no value."</p>
<p>"Yes, Tubbo, they do! They matter because of our memories. Don't you remember sitting and watching the sunset? Everything we've been through, and it all leads back to the discs. I care about the discs because of you! Don't you see?" </p>
<p>Tubbo's face remained calm and unbothered. </p>
<p>"He doesn't care, Tommy. He doesn't care anymore because you've already fucked it up." </p>
<p>This new voice came from behind him. Tommy whirled around, seeing no one there. Then, Dream appeared. </p>
<p>"Why are you here? Why are you always fucking here. Just leave me be. Let me forget," Tommy yelled at him. Dream only smiled slightly, looking over Tommy's shoulder. </p>
<p>"You really thought he would come to see you? You really thought he would care enough anymore? I'll bet he hasn't given you a second thought since the moment you were out of sight down the river. He hated you. You've ruined everything, and now he hates you."</p>
<p>"I want to go home. I want to go home. Please, let me go home." Tommy choked on a sob. </p>
<p>"You're never going home. You'll spend Christmas here alone. You'll spend birthdays and summers and holidays here all alone. That's what you deserve, Tommy. You really think you still deserve friends after everything? Do you really believe that if Wilbur had any idea about what was actually going on, if he understood things in depth anymore, that he would be with you? He thinks it's a vacation, Tommy. And he's a ghost. So do you really even have him?"</p>
<p>"Please."</p>
<p>"You're alone, Tommy."</p>
<p>"Please, Dream. Please, let me come home. Please."</p>
<p>"It's funny that you think he would really want to see you. After all of this. Wake up, Tommy. Wake up." </p>
<p>————</p>
<p>Tommy's eyes flew open, his breathing uneven and tears welling up in his eyes. He let them fall freely for once, taking in his surroundings. He wasn't in his tent, but in Ghostbur's. The ghost was beside him, a curious look on his face. </p>
<p>"Tommy, are you alright?" he asked in his usual airy and calm tone. He didn't sound concerned. Was that even something he was capable of feeling? </p>
<p>"Wilbur, I want to go home. I want to go home and I want to sit on my bench with Tubbo and watch the sunset and listen to my discs. I wouldn't even mind that ridiculous tower, I just want to go home. I miss it so much."</p>
<p>"We can go home, Tommy. I went through the nether portal, remember?"</p>
<p>"I can't, Wilbur. He'll kill me." Tommy's sobs grew louder, and he curled in on himself, not bothering to look at Ghostbur</p>
<p>"Who will, Tommy?" </p>
<p>"Dream."</p>
<p>"Dream is the green one. He was nice, he brought us here in a boat." </p>
<p>"He's not nice, Wilbur. This is his fault. It's his fault and now we're here and I can never go back. I just wanted Christmas."</p>
<p>"We can make Christmas here. It's Logstedshire. Lot's of trees." His statement only made Tommy cry harder. </p>
<p>It really was his fault. He couldn't believe that his dream turned nightmare had felt so real. Tubbo just being there should have been a red flag. Why would Tubbo come see him anyway? Tubbo didn't understand his logic, the importance of the discs. He had thrown away their friendship, forgotten it, for their country. For some fucked up ideal. </p>
<p>"I wish I could forget like you, Wilbur," Tommy said after many minutes of silence. </p>
<p>"No, Tommy. You don't want to forget. It hurts, you know. Everything I feel like I should know is blank." </p>
<p>It was the first time Ghostbur had something that didn't feel neutral. Every opinion he expressed lacked feeling. But not this. He sounded bitter, and slightly sad. The moment passed quickly though. Tommy looked up, and Ghostbur was holding something out to him. </p>
<p>"Are you sad, Tommy? Would you like some Blue?"</p>
<p>What Tommy could really use was a hug. Or someone fully capable of empathy. But he smiled a watery smile and took the Blue. </p>
<p>"Thank you," he said quietly.</p>
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